BY Nicky Denegri

DATE: 16 JAN 2013


Here at Kissing With Confidence we’re great fans of personal development – for ourselves as well as others!  It’s not a case of “do as we say, not as we do” – we really do try to live and breathe what we train.

Here’s a case in point.  We’ve been doing a lot of work with clients recently around team working and development, particularly dealing with a) change, b) conflict and c) “filling the gaps” in respect of the skills/processes needed to get things done efficiently and effectively – ie how to identify what’s needed and then provide that.

Around a month ago, the whole team convened (a bit of a rarity, given our trainers’ hectic schedules) to spend two days on our personal development – as a team and a business.  For one of the afternoon sessions, we used the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) to work out how we can communicate even more clearly in terms of what we need from one another, and identify our particular “drivers” when seeking information and problem-solving.

For those of you unfamiliar with MBTI, it’s a questionnaire designed to help you identify and communicate how you prefer to a) take in information, b) make decisions, c) organise yourself and d) where your energy comes from.  There’s no “right or wrong”; we talk about “right and right” – working out what approach works best given the people you’re dealing with and the task at hand.

During the afternoon we had loads of lightbulbs flashing as we identified what people need and how to provide that; we also committed to (and are following up on) 1:1 chats to embed our initial discussions and commitments to action further.

What’s my point here?  Quite simply that for excellence in our performance we all have to step out of what feels natural, easy and good into the opposite states of being at times.  Why?  Because this helps to get things done and build better relationships.  It may feel tough, but the more you practise, the easier it gets.  It also means that we’re more able to identify where there’s a “natural” gap and move in to fill that when the occasion demands.  Fancy giving it a try?  Let us know how you get on if so!


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about the author

Nicky Denegri is our Senior Consultant. If you would like to know more about this subject, drop her an email and we will be in touch.

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